My Own Worst Enemy

by S. E. Hart

i.

I fuck all the wrong boys
and slither from beneath their sheets
while quietly they do sleep
in sickening satisfaction

I down bottle of pills and vodka for relief
just a twist and a splash of juice
to sweeten the esophageal erosion
oh how it stifles the internal implosions

so that I may find a new boy
one that's perfectly wrong
which makes him so perfectly right
to play chicken with my flight or fight

I am my own worst enemy


ii.

don't hate me
but how dare you
try to
love me

don't walk away from me
but how dare you
even attempt to
stay with me

don't let me go
but how dare you
think for one second
that you could contain me

I am my own worst enemy


iii.

I circumvent the most honest of men
castrate their efforts in mere moments
leaving them hanging
by feeble threads

for hell hath no fury
like a woman scorned
yet I easily scorn myself
threefold

'suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not,
for of such is the Kingdom of God'
only it is I who have locked myself out
and scheduled my own burning

I am my own worst enemy